Houston, we've got a problem

It's my second sleepless night.. My eyes tired, my body sores (due to the super weird position I slept in last night), my back aches (unfortunatelly not because I have huge boobs).. but I can't sleeeeeepp.. boo hoo! I just realized how thin the walls are.. I could hear my housemate giggling in the middle of the rnb music she's playing.. I could even hear my neighbours upstairs chatting.. BLAH! So I'll just write down my mumbo jumbo here, while I wait for myself to get sleepy..

Do you think I should go to yoga classes? It's not rare that I have trouble sleeping.. I envy those people who can sleep whenever they want.. Hate you.. um.. anytime-sleepers?!

As I laid down on my bed trying to put myself to sleep, a few thoughts came across my mind.. I think I'm the most unproductive person on earth.. People in their 20s are usually busy with their activities, whether it's their jobs, their hobbies, their social lives.. If I looked at people around me.. my close friends.. They all have something they are passionate about, they're running around pursuing something and going places.. While I just sit here and happily listen to their stories.. and secretly admiring them..

Then I tried to analyze why that is.. Is it because the way I was raised (easiest solution, blame your old man!) or maybe it's just in my genes (again... hehehe) Back then, during my high school years, I've never stepped out of my comfort zone.. I've never gone anywhere by myself.. I've never done anything I didn't wanna do.. There was always my parents who'd cover for me.. I don't think I've ever worked hard in my life to get what I wanted, cos usually it's either given to me.. or I just never wanted anything so badly (maybe because it's already been given to me.. huh?) I never have high expectations of myself cos I'm too scared that I'd let myself down, I don't push myself hard enough.. and that's made me... a spoilt brat!

HOUSTON, WE REALLY DO HAVE A PROBLEM! I'm a spoilt brat with light insomnia.. hehehe

But then again, I'm now here.. thousands of kms away from my parents, and it's been almost 6 years.. Although the roles of my parents are often replaced by my own very lovely friends, I'm taking baby steps out of the so called comfort zone.. So maybe it's not that bad anyway eh?! Everything needs process and maybe it's a slower one for me.. I just need to push myself harder.. Btw, I have the best parents a child could ask for!

Not yet sleepy..

I also think about something I could like.. as we all know (yes, you do) I'm a person without any hobby.. Um, maybe my hobby is my friends.. most of the times I don't care what to do or where to go, as long as I have them around me.. they're my addiction, my safety net..

I'm turning into a mellowati dehhhhh.. lack of sleep leads to sudden emotional outburst.. *pengen nangis* huhuhu.. muhauah.. aneh ya.. you might be thinking, what's wrong with this chick.. well, don't think! I might be too complicated to understand.. but there's no need for you to understand me anyway.. just read my bloody blog and enjoy it.. or at least pretend that you enjoy it, and do come back to read some more :)

Things I might like.. I narrowed down all the things in the world into a couple of options:
1. Writing.. I like writing crap, but I'm not sure people would like reading my crap.. And in order to improve my skills in writing crap, I need to read crap other people wrote.. But I HATE reading.. So?

2. Diving.. is cool.. one and a half somersault tuck! hehehe

3. Pottery making.. one word to explain it "Ghost".. and I always like getting my hands dirty.. glass blowing is also an option

4. Singing.. hehehehehe

5. Master an instrument.. and a dance

6. Learn at least 4 more foreign language

7. Wrestle or box hehe

Hmm.. I think this list has turned into a list of things I wanna do before I reach... 30? 35? except for number 1... and 4... what else.. Reni just asked me a weird question.. that has left me wondering.. and made me forgot about what I was going to write.. hehehe..

This is quite a long post.. guess I'd just leave it here.. but I'll be back, peepol! Not to worry.. toodoloooo...